Working from home? Or working at home?

I remember when I was at work (physically), I used to meet my husband for lunch. It was cute back then, an Italian BMT to share, a bag of Sensations and a drink… to share, just simple but enough. And then lockdown was bestowed upon us, and now sharing a bag of crisps is just the tip of the iceberg. 

We used to have a rule in our house. We weren’t allowed to mention the ‘W’ word before 9pm on a Sunday when the weekend hit. Yet now I find myself talking about it all the time. It’s not about having to work, (although it wouldn’t hurt to win the lottery once in a while), it’s more about trying to find that line between work life and home life. How do you stop them merging into one?

Before, it used to be easy to walk out of the office and leave everything at the door. But times have changed, and so has the way we work. Home is where your comfort is, where you zone off and where you get your ‘zen’.. and now.. it’s where you work. 

For me, the lines have become blurred and I’m switching between roles of mother, wife and employee all in one day. Where I had time to focus on my work and give it my sole attention, I now have to juggle between entertaining a 1 year old and partially a 31 year old. Luckily, Cbeebies have supplied us with the goods, and Hey Duggee’s ‘stick song’ is forever a vibe in our house, for both of them. 

Working from home and managing a little human is definitely hard work. Where I used to be able to freely spend my time doing what I wanted on my lunches, all my time now revolves around the little whirlwind in our house. There isn’t much of a break, and when ‘nursery day’ comes, I get a little sigh of relief, because I know. I know I won’t be drinking lukewarm tea today! 

Every weekend I convince myself that a routine will be in order from Monday, we’ll try things a different way I’ll say, I’ll have ‘me’ time every week and we’ll make a meal plan for the baby. Then I strut around the house, 100% confident that I’ve solved this dilemma only to find myself in the same position next Sunday.  

The truth is there’s going to be days, weeks, or what I can confirm to be months where things just don’t go to plan. Sometimes you’ll do a weekly shop and end up having 4 takeaways that week, and sometimes you’ll cook everyday and pretend you have a YouTube channel (don’t lie, we all do it).

Recently, rather than bringing myself down for the things I haven’t done, I’ve started to take glory in the things I’ve achieved over this ‘unprecedented’ time. I’ve painted 3 walls of my living room, and realised that 60 minute makeover was a lie. I’ve actually sat down and enjoyed a whole cup of tea without it going cold and I’ve organised half of my kitchen with ‘fancy’ storage (thank you Home Edit) to make it pretty. 

I know these aren’t massive life impacting things, but they’re enough to make me feel good about myself in this situation. And that’s enough.

We’re all trying to cope with lockdown, and with the changes but sometimes we focus so hard on what hasn’t been done, we forget what we’ve achieved. Whether it’s a big thing or small thing, if you’ve done something that makes you feel that little bit better, then I’m proud of you. It’s another day you mustered the strength to understand that you can handle this. 

-n

Ain’t No Party Like An Isolation Party!

After being at home for nine months on maternity leave, I was massively excited about going back to work. I thought of little things like the commute on the tram, fresh air alone, grabbing a Caramel Mac (or a Frappe in this weather) from Starbucks and just having an adult conversation. They didn’t seem like much before, but you realise how much you take for granted when you’re at home. So what do you do when the entire country is on lockdown and you’re having to work from home?

We are living in what I can only describe as surreal and life-changing circumstances. There is such an array of emotions that I’m sure we’re all feeling right now. I mean how do you manage to look after your children (and apparently your husband as recent results have shown) whilst working? How do you handle being in the house all day with only an hour of ‘outside time’? It’s difficult not having time to yourself, it’s hard not being able to go out and see your loved ones, and I can only imagine how lonely it must feel for those who are on their own.

We’re all in different situations at the moment, some of us have children to look after whilst working, some of us are used to being out of the house so this is quite difficult, and a lot of us are anxious about not being able to do the things we used to. It feels like these unprecedented times (how many times have you heard that word?) have really taken their toll on us and our minds too.

I read something the other day and it sounds odd but the more I say it, the more it resonates with me. “You have to remember that you’re not just working from home. You are in your home during a crisis, trying to work”. It’s a completely different ballgame. It’s not an option that’s been provided to you, it’s something we must do. So when you have days that aren’t as productive, or you have moments where you’re battling your thoughts, I assure you that you’re not alone. We’re all here with you.

We’re all trying to find a balance and we know it’s not easy, but give yourself some credit. You’ve been doing this for so many weeks and you’re getting through it. Self-love and self-care are so important right now, so use this time to focus on you and give yourself the attention you deserve! I know social media plays a big part and sometimes we give in and feel like we must do something new and productive every day, but this isn’t a productivity contest. It’s about understanding how our mind and body will get through this, and if that means binge-watching Netflix, then so be it but if it means doing a 5k run every day, that’s okay too! Honestly, don’t be so hard on yourself by comparing yourself to others! Get a face mask on, treat yourself to a glass of wine or a cuppa, or start a new hobby that you’ve been putting off for a while, now is the time!

I know it’s easier said than done and it breaks my heart when I’m calling my family knowing I can’t be with them right now but we need to learn to live with the circumstances and work with them rather than letting it turn into a grey cloud that follows us around.

If anything, I feel like this time has shown me how grateful I am for the things I used to take for granted. A catch up with friends, a trip to see my parents, walking down the road for no reason at all. But just because we can’t go out to do this, it doesn’t mean we can’t do it at home! There’s Whatsapp, House Party and Zoom (we know 40 minutes isn’t enough) and that’s just to name a few. Yes, we easily get bored but make this time your own. Host a pub quiz or a face mask Friyay with your sisters, download Tik Tok (hey, we know it’s your guilty pleasure!), but please please please check up on your friends and family because trust me when I say this… although we’re all feeling some type of way, you’d be surprised at how many people will feel the same as you right now.

Stay safe, stay home and please stay in touch.

-n